WELCOME TO RESTORYING

David M. Boje & Grace Ann Rosile

February 8, 2013; Revised February 23, 2019: Revised mar 5, 2025

Storytelling is an art. We are storytelling animals. Storytelling is my focus. Storytelling is what I do in teaching, writing, consulting, and research for 35 years. See Youtube at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VcsPh-5QbdE I love to help people and organizations find this storytelling path. It is easy to become a character in someone else's master narrative. It is more helpful to find your own living story path. Its a matter of finding you voice. Join us at our annual conference https://davidboje.com/quantum We have a mix of storytelling consulting practitioners, researchers, and clients who celebrate finding their own living story. I work with my colleagues in Denmark in two venues. One is the Material Storytelling Lab in Aalborg University where I am said to be the godfather to the lab. Material Storytelling (Anete Strand's pioneering dissertation and lab direction), is based on Karen Barad's work (and a bit of my own), to look at the intra-activity of 'social' with the 'material'. It is part of a huge movement called 'sociomateriality.' We use the term 'quantum storytelling' to get at how there is no separation between social and material. We are both/and. In Denmark I work with TRUE STORYTELLING, a project by Jens Larson, and Lena Larson, to do storytelling boot camps. True Storytelling is possible in consciousness raising boot camps of self-transformation and critical reflexive inquiry into our own habituated thoughts and actions within micro-physics systems, and embedded macro-political systems of power. It is possible to recover an agency of resistance to normalization under the detailed disciplinary technologies of the institutions we work in.

I hope to see you at our events. To get on our mailing list, click here. David

 

Table 1: 7 STEPS of Embodied Restorying Process (ERP)

1. Recharacterize (received Organization identity) from how other organizations are telling it.

2. Externalize (re-label) Make the Problem the Problem, not the Person as the problem.

3. Sympathize (benefits) – of old story of or your organization has its payoffs

4. Revise (consequences) – What are the negative consequences, including the stereotypes of received organization identities being applied to you?

5. Strategize (Little Wow Moments of exception to Others' dominant master narratives); Reclaim Little Wow Moments

6. Restory (rehistoricizes the old dominant narratives by collecting Little Wow Moments into A 'New Story' of you several possibility futures), to not be stuck in the past, reliving one event

7. Publicize (support networking) e.g. letter writing, social media, celebratory events with supporters of your ‘New Story’ of future and potentiality, to stay in the ‘new world.’






















Embodied Restorying Process (ERP) is a a novel that begins with♥-of-Care. It begins with mindfulness, embodiment practices to understand the FOUR SELVES: Social-Self, Frozen-Self, Mirror-Self, and ♥-Self. These four selves are in dialogue, continual conversation, in our mind's eye (see http://peaceaware.com).

Embodied Restorying Process (ERP) can be effectively combined with mindfulness meditations, such as Vipassana and with Psychocalisthenics exercise to help recovery from Stress, Anxiety, and Depression that veterans often face, after returning from deployment Restorying ptsd).

ERP deconstructs the Life Time Disorder Label (PTSD) as junk science by the pharmecuetical industry and the DSMers.

ERP moves you out of cacophony into polyphony (the symphony of voices conversing in our mind). ERP is combined with mindfulness skill training so that the 'new story' is supported by dialogues among your Selves that connect to world making.



The Gentle Touch: Coaching with Embodied Restorying Process (ERP)

By David Boje

Introduction: The Power of Restorying with a Gentle Touch

In coaching, there is a profound difference between pushing change onto an entrepreneur and gently guiding them into a space where they recognize their own power to transform. This is the foundation of Embodied Restorying Process (ERP)—a seven-step coaching approach designed to help clients navigate their lived stories, recognize limiting narratives, and construct new, empowering stories.

At its heart, ERP is about how we make sense of ourselves. Our minds filter out 99.9% of reality every second, leaving us with only fragments of the world. These fragments become our stories—shaped by habits, cultural norms, and past experiences. But what if those stories no longer serve us? What if they limit our well-being and our ability to thrive?

This workshop in Brisbane will take participants through a structured yet flexible approach to restorying their entrepreneurial journeys. The key is The Gentle Touch, an idea echoed in Ernest Hemingway’s words:

"In our darkest moments, we don't need advice or solutions. What we need is human connection, a quiet presence, a gentle touch."

ERP is not about forcing change; it’s about gently inviting a shift—at the right moment—through deep listening, mirror neurons, and recharacterization of personal and professional identities.

The Seven Steps of ERP

  1. Recharacterize – Examine how the world defines your organization or identity.
  2. Externalize – Label the problem, making it the problem, not you as the problem.
  3. Sympathize – Understand the benefits of holding onto the current story.
  4. Revise – Recognize the negative consequences of this received identity.
  5. Strategize – Identify Little Wow Moments (LWMs) that challenge dominant narratives.
  6. Restory – Collect LWMs into a New Story—one that is no longer bound by the past.
  7. Publicize – Build a support system that reinforces this New Story.

The ERP Cycle in Action: Coaching Questions for Each Step

Step 1: Recharacterizing the Story

At this stage, the coach observes body language, voice tonality, and shifts in breath—watching for signs of resistance or openness. The Gentle Touch is used strategically to guide the entrepreneur toward Step 2.

Step 2: Externalizing the Problem

Here, the entrepreneur gives a name to the problem (e.g., "Mr. Gremlin" or "The Overachiever"), ensuring that they are not the problem—only the story they are entangled in. The coach stays silent at crucial moments, resisting the urge to "solve" or "fix" the client.

Step 3: Sympathizing with the Story’s Benefits

It is essential to recognize why the entrepreneur clings to a limiting story—there is always a why. The Gentle Touchacknowledges the benefits of holding onto the past without reinforcing the problem.

Step 4: Revising the Consequences

Coaches must remain just long enough in the awareness of the problem’s consequences—without allowing the entrepreneur to fall back into the PSA (Problem Saturated Account).

Step 5: Strategizing with Little Wow Moments (LWMs)

These Little Wow Moments become the foundation of a new history. The Gentle Touch is used again: "If you did not have this label, how would you rewrite your life story?" At this moment, silence is vital. The coach does not fill the space—the entrepreneur must be the first to speak.

Step 6: Restorying into a New Narrative

This is where the New Story emerges from the entrepreneur’s authentic self. The coach’s role is not to craft it for them but to create the space where it can be discovered. The conversation of your True Self with the 4 WHO's.

Step 7: Publicizing the New Story

A New Story is fragile without reinforcement. The entrepreneur needs a support network to keep the New Story alive. Mirror neurons play a crucial role here—when others reflect the New Story back to the entrepreneur, it strengthens their belief in it.

Key Takeaways for Coaches and Facilitators

  1. Never reinforce a PSA – Do not let the client relive their problem. Instead, externalize and recharacterize it.
  2. Mirror positive neurons – Your energy as a coach will shape the entrepreneur’s emotional state.
  3. Rehistoricize through LWMs – The true self needs a new stage free of PSA influence.
  4. Use staging artifacts – Entrepreneurs must see, hear, and feel the shift in their story.
  5. Publicize with a support network – The more the story is told, the more it becomes real.

Beyond the ERP Cycle: Sensemaking and Story Filters

ERP is not just about changing the story—it’s about recognizing the limitations of our ability to perceive reality. Our consciousness filters out nearly all information, leaving us with narrow, pre-scripted stories. The Gentle Touch in coaching is about helping entrepreneurs drop outdated filters and open themselves to new, expanded ways of seeing.

In many ways, this is about unlearning. It is about letting go of culturally-imposed identities, of fixed notions of success and failure, and of the need for external validation.

This is the deep work of Embodied Restorying.

Closing Reflection: The Gentle Touch in Practice

"My positivity is a castle around me, protecting me from all negativity. A beautiful, true self dwells in my castle. I must experience the truth of my true self."

This is the heart of ERP. We are all navigating time and energy in different ways. Some waste it, some scatter it in a hundred directions, and some—through deep introspection—find the path inward, toward an inexhaustible wellspring of potential.

Albert Einstein discovered infinite potential by looking inward. So too can entrepreneurs—if they are willing to rewrite their stories.

The Brisbane workshop will explore these principles deeply, integrating lived experience, mirror neurons, and The Gentle Touch as the foundation of transformational coaching.

As a coach, facilitator, or entrepreneur, the question remains:

Are you ready to step into your New Story?

Sources & Further Reading


ERP coaches keep their emotions in the high range of enlightenment, peace, joy, and love, and work with clients how are in lower range of emotional vibraitons: anger, fear, grief, apath, guilt, and shame. This is the Master Key to why Gentle Touch ERP is so effective and transformational.

“You are what exists before all stories. You are what remains when the story is understood” — Byron Katie (2008: 26). 


You are what exist before not only your own personal living stories, but also the dumb grand narratives that cultures, governments, corporations, and their managerial agents try to socialize, indoctrinate, or cajole you into. Living stories are ontologically situated, Being-there-in-the-world.


This means you are the one who Restories your Self, your relations to Others, and Ecosystem, by increasing your Awareness. Awareness grows with each Restorying. Embodied Restorying Process - Veterans YouTube 22 minutes) is a an example of doing repeated Restorying to bring about Embodiment of the relation of Self to Others, Ecosystem, through increasing Awareness.

 For more see https://davidboje.com

You are what exist before not only your own personal living stories, but also the dumb grand narratives that cultures, governments, corporations, and their managerial agents try to socialize, indoctrinate, or cajole you into. Living stories are ontologically situated, Being-there-in-the-world. To get in touch with your ontological living story is to recapture your own embodiment in aliveness process of Being-in space, in-time, and in-new materialisms. Here we will focus on the 'quantum' new materialisms (Boje, 2014a). Through the Observer Effect, you can gain Awareness that we are 90% unaware of the Others, the Ecosystem, and our own Self.

 

 

 


Restorying References

Boje, D. M. (2001). Narrative Methods for Organizational & Communication Research. London: Sage.Boje, D. M., Flora, J., Rosile, G. A., EnglandKennedy, L., Vaillancourt, K., Marin, M. R., & Strand, A. (2015). Equine-restorying Military Family Research. Las Cruces, NM.

Boje, David, Motamedi,  Kurt and Rosile, Grace Ann (2010). "Change with Academy of Management (AoM-USA). June 14-16.

Boje, D., & Rosile, G. A. (2003a). Comparison of socio‐economic and other transorganizational development methods. Journal of organizational change management, 16(1), 10-20.
Boje, D., & Rosile, G. A. (2003b). Theatrics of SEAM. Journal of Organizational Change Management, 16(1), 21-32.

Boje, D. M., & Rosile, G. A. (2008). Specters of Wal-Mart: A critical discourse analysis of stories of Sam Walton's ghost. Critical discourse studies, 5(2), 153-179.  https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/17405900801990116?casa_token=N371TgvS7CEAAAAA:vrJF2LqH6SU019uCK4uydzvByiA0nU6YpWiyN4QP-xXxCv8GpjJNEd_8L5fOWFrftoG08DkljyNaQCA

Boje, D. M., & Rosile, G. A. (2015, March). Equine-assisted restorying for veterans and their loved ones. In Presentation at the annual conference of the Equine Assisted Growth and Learning Association (EAGALA), Utah.

Boje, D. M., & Rosile, G. A. (2016). Restorying Indigenous Leadership: Generative Metaphors from Apache Storytelling Traditions. Leadership, 12(3), 385-412.
Boje, D. M., & Rosile, G. A. (2018). Releasing Story Filters: The Seven Steps of Embodied Restorying Process.

Boje, D., & Rosile, G. A. (2020). How to use conversational storytelling interviews for your dissertation. Edward Elgar Publishing.

Boje, D. M., Rosile, G. A., Dennehy, R., & Summers, D. J. (1997). Restorying reengineering: Some deconstructions and postmodern alternatives. Communication Research, 24(6), 631-668.  https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0093650297024006003?casa_token=hE8Pnu4dsJ0AAAAA:-Lyx8V8iv7duaFmJOkvelSTgtSiwVErIxVPzEGpPuGZ5pcbuvQAdh59rrLFan7LFOU0oEEXgqt2B9io

Boje, D. M., Rosile, G. A., Hacker, K. L., England Kennedy, E. S., & Flora, J. (2013). Combining restorying and equine-assisted skills training in counselor communication designed to help soldiers and their families recover from traumatic stress. Interdisciplinary grant approved for funding by NMSU Office for Research, Dec 9th.

Boje, D. M., & Rosile, G. D., Summers, D (1997) .‘Restorying reengineering: Some deconstructions and postmodern alternatives’ Special Issue on Throwaway Employees. Journal of Communication Research, 24(6), 631-668.

Cast, M. L., Ann Rosile, G., Boje, D. M., & Saylors, R. (2013). Restorying a hard day’s work. In The Role of Emotion and Emotion Regulation in Job Stress and Well Being (pp. 257-281). Emerald Group Publishing Limited.

Flora, J., Boje, D. M., Rosile, G. A., & Hacker, K. (2016). A Theoretical and Applied Review of Embodied Restorying for Post-Deployment Family Reintegration. Journal of Veterans Studies, 1(1), 129-162. https://journal-veterans-studies.org/articles/41/files/submission/proof/41-1-53-1-10-20180518.pdf
Rosile, G. A. (1998). Restorying for strategic organizational planning and development: The case of the Sci Fi organization.

Rosile, G. A. (2007). Cheating: Making it a teachable moment. Journal of Management Education, 31(5), 582-613.

Rosile, G. A. (2011). The Antenarrative of ethics and the ethics of antenarratives. In Storytelling and the Future of Organizations (pp. 87-100). Routledge.

Rosile, G. A., & Boje, D. M. (2002). Restorying and postmodern organization theater: Consultation in the storytelling organization. Chapter 15, pp. 271-‐290 in Ronald R. Sims (Ed.) Changing the Way We Manage Change. Wesport, CONN.

Rosile, G. A., Boje, D. M., Carlon, D. M., Downs, A., & Saylors, R. (2013). Storytelling diamond: An antenarrative integration of the six facets of storytelling in organization research design. Organizational Research Methods, 16(4), 557-580.
ROSILE, G. A., & BOJE, D. (2021). SPIRAL Experiments. Making Sense of Stories: An Inquirer's Compendium, 116.

Rosile, G. A., Dennehy, R. F., & Bodensteiner, N. M. (1998). Restorying for personal and organizational change. Proceedings of the Southwest Academy of Management, Dallas, TX, March.

Rosile, G. A., Herder, R., & Boardman, C. M. (2016). American Indian and Euro-Western negotiations: Creating mutual benefit with upsurging antenarrative spirals. Journal of Strategic Contracting and Negotiation, 2(4), 269-293.